Dating a married african man

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Black culture is perceived as inferior because it does not give value to individualism, independence or women.

Women who think like I used to have been fed so much Western culture from birth that we’ve never developed the ability to see the value of our own culture or critique Western culture.

For a long time that’s how I felt about black men and that’s how many young black women feel today.

We’ve seen our mothers cry over the hurt of discovering yet another affair and have witnessed them covering up the bruises in makeup.

Why would I commit myself to a lifetime of disappointment and misery?

Some have had the benefit of having been raised by a good, loving and trustworthy black man.

Some have had the benefit of a responsible black father. We fear repeating the same pattern of relationship that we saw growing up and consciously or subconsciously we have made the decision that the only way to prevent that is by marrying someone as different as possible to our fathers. But you need to realise that it does not matter what colour the man you marry is, that fear is something that you will carry in to your marriage.

There is value in both cultures and we need to appreciate both; there is value in black and white men and we need to appreciate both.

At some point we need to move away from academic discussions and get personal about why we hate black men and, by extension, ourselves.

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